De zinbarrel , 18-04-2013

locals... haha - South island has developed a reputation for ‘local assholes’, but I think that's been overhyped. I've lived here 2 years and surfed pretty much every day that the surf is up. In my experience people here are generally quite chill. I’ve had very few negative encounters. The odd time somebody has acted up, I can assure you it’s all bark, no bite.
The waves here are mostly rocky reef and point breaks which work in machine-like fashion with very specific takeoff zones. So the lineups are very compressed and you’re shoulder to shoulder with everyone. In any random group of people there are bound to be a few assholes now and then.
With that being said, I keep out of people’s way, I follow etiquette, and when I paddle for a wave I generally catch it. Therefore I have pleasant encounters on the water.
If you put others in danger because you’re not in control of your board it’s going to provoke a conversation, and it should.
If you get in position, paddle for a wave and miss it, then paddle past people and back into position, you will hear something.
If you start 100m outside of the peak and paddle your SUP straight towards shore on a non-breaking wave then decide to go back door at the last second and cut off a surfer who was lined up for the wave right on the peak, you will hear something (in that particular case it was me doing the barking).
So basically just use your head out there and have respect for the waves and the people on them.

De Anonymous , 15-10-2010

Small correction.. - Hey guys,

Just letting you know that Firsts is NOT to the right when facing the water from the beach. Firsts is the break to the left, Chickens is in the center (you got that right) and Seconds is to the right. Much further right you have Waterfalls.

Thanks

De Biggest Bollocks , 06-07-2010

Oooooh - this place is schweeee eeet! I'm on my way and I'm gonna surf all over you "local" fkrs like speedbumps!! HAHAHAHA RAAAAH!

De dakkar777 , 09-01-2010

timmmbbeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr - i was in Sombrio 20 years ago mid winter, no swell flat as , lake like , kinda glad , fuck it looked cold, What i do remember is sleeping in this shack owned (i think) by some poof with a fondness of beer, I watched him get smashed one morning and then get the bright idea to cut down the biggest fucken tree you ever saw, we'll he drunk and hacked away all day , as we left in the arvo the moment arrived, now near legless he ties a rope and with his donut mate pulls and ,,,,CRACK !! the thing starts to fall then ,,, Bump ! it gets hooked up to another tree and creates a widow maker like i never seen.right next to the shack. Fucken funny , still get a giggle remembering these to poo packers arguing over who's fault it was.

De A Logical, Normal and Travelled Surfer , 21-08-2009

The "secret" is out. Get over it. - To all you low-functioning fucktards of diminished capacity who feel angry about the fact your sacred spots have been "discovered"...

Oh my God. Get. A. Life.

In case you didn't already notice, THE HIGHWAY IS LIKE 5 FUCKING FEET AWAY FROM JORDAN RIVER.

Unless you want to expand your gay little "sauna" so that it includes a 70 foot fence on the beach, every car that ever passes the place when the surf is on will clearly see this.

So please, if you consider yourself to be a "local" on Van Isl (as funny as that is), please consider the following simple truths that speak to the contrary...

1. You have no legal claim over the ocean. That is crown property, so unless your name is "The Queen" or Stephen Fucking Harper - go fuck yourself, as I'm sure you do often enough already.

2. You all suck at surfing. Horribly. As someone who's surfed in virtually every continent, I can strongly assure you, and those reading this, that Canadian surfers are terrible - on average. Yes, there are exceptions.

But the difference is that in Hawaii, or SoCal, or OZ - everyone rips. Everyone's good. And almost NOBODY is an asshole or acts like they own the place. Because logically, they understand that they do not.

That's what the "real" locals are like. They're good at surfing, they're logical and they're respectful.

So please - accept the very obvious and indisputble fact that you are average surfers at BEST, and that to live out your little fantasy of being a "surf local", the reality is that you need to chill the fuck out and have fun.

And finally...

3. Travel and surf in other places. This single act will be humbling, exciting and completely shatter your existing notion of what the "real" surfers act like.

I realize that this comment is stretching on, and considering the literacy of my intended audience - and the lack of pictures or shiny objects included - I'll have to wind things down to a single, simple conclusion...

YOU AREN'T "LOCAL"

You're a resident surfer. Just like me. Just like the noobies. Just like everyone else.

Surfing on south island will inevitably only continue to grow in popularity, and it is completely assinine to believe that people will keep this a "secret".

Grow up, grow a pair, and focus on surfing.

Instead of being an asshole.

Yours truly,

-Resident Surfer

P.S. To the dumbass who talked about "torching cars"... are you fucking serious?

Buddy, that's the kind of stuff that you do jail time for. Is your ego worth a criminal record?

Get a life!

De Anonymous , 12-05-2009

Joe Shmo - Why, why why? Who are these people that feel the need to continue exposing surf spots? Does it make people feel better about themselves? Are these people really that desperate for attention that they need to divulge all the moods of this surf break? Why post GPS coordinates? Is there some satisfaction to this?

This overexposure is killing this place…Not only are the kooks (by kook I mean people that are good enough to stand but shit at navigating their boards to avoid obstacles ie people) making the lineup a living hell, but all the weekend warriors (by weekend warriors I mean out-of-towners) who are camping at the beach are killing this place…Have you noticed all the trash and shit around lately? Have you started to notice all the gouges out of the trees and branches for Firewood? Have you started to notice all the spray paint and graffiti?

No wonder localism runs rampant here...People dedicate years to learning the "moods" of this special surf spot and care for it dearly. So, when buddy-boy kook poser (and gaggle of friends) show up when its going off - he/she paddles for every wave, camps, sings kumbaya, leaves a fucking mess (shit, piss, beercans, food, smouldering pits) its understandable that people get choked…To top it off, all the trash and shit that gets left behind is left for the bears, which then turn to garbage bears…which ultimately leads to the destruction of the animal…

I realize that the crowds are here to stay and I’m fine with that (although it would be good to have the place all to my self some days…selfish, but isn’t surfing selfish anyways?) but it would be great if people would just SHOW SOME F&*^ING RESPECT and GIVE BACK to a place that GIVES SO MUCH…

De keep it real , 26-02-2009

google earth?? - why? do you not like discovery? did you go here with a gps your first trip? there is no need to put pins on internet maps saying where really nice surf spots are. Keeping secrets or being discrete is an honest respectful way to be. good luck.

De dfbland , 23-02-2009

- Its a magical place ... when we were there with magical food.

The waves were the best I have seen in all of Canada, BUT, it is rocky and you can expect a few others in the water who surf there regularly, give these guys some respect and they will do the same for you, its all fun if your having fun ..... remember that if some guy is dropping in on your waves and expects you to laugh about it (it is Canada, chill out).

De Anonymous , 02-01-2009

- The old guys there DEMAND respect, and they expect you to smile and laugh when they snake you. Absolute bullshit. It MIGHT be acceptable when they can actually surf.
When you see old DOUCHEBAGS being assholes to arguably Canada's best pro (Peter Devries) there is something SERIOUSLY wrong.
Kooks. Old bloody kooks.

De Anonymous , 16-12-2008

peaks - firsts is to the left, seconds the right, and waterfalls is a right...not a left hander. Surf Tofino if you are learning it'll be more fun, sth island isn't ideal.